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#turnip

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Day 26
Turnip has a spot of lunch
Today, the turnip and I went into town to post our thank you letters and have a spot of lunch. We were served by an amusing...
Day 25
What animal would you be?
I asked the turnip what animal he would like to be. He said he'd like to be a magnificent stag. I tried to recreate what thi...
Day 24
Thank you, Bryan Singer
The turnip reminded me that we hadn't given thanks for Bryan Singer's film, 'The Usual Turnips', which we watched a few days a...
Day 22
Heartbreak
The turnip wanted to know what heartbreak was. For a quick example, I took him into the garden, to the place where my three cats are buried...
Day 21
Education through film 3
I've decided to show the turnip just a few more films to complete his education. Today, we watched 'The Usual Suspects'. He s...
Day 20
Thank you, Krzysztof
The turnip said we should thank Krzysztof for "Three Colours Blue", but sadly he died in 1996. So instead, we are expressing our...
Day 19
Education through film 2
The turnip's education continues. Today we watched Kielowski's classic, "Three Colours Blue". I asked him to imagine he was J...
Day 18
Thank you, Oliver
The turnip asked if we could thank Oliver Stone for writing and directing 'Platoon'. I thought a good way of thanking him would be t...
Day 17
Education through film 1
Freud tells me that the turnip's problems stem from an underdeveloped superego. He suggested I try to broaden the turnip's ho...
Day 15
This can't go on
I could forgive him stealing my soup and asking existential questions, but today the turnip ate one of my fajitas. He has gained anot...
Day 14
Existential
The turnip is conscious. The first thing he said to me was, "Why are we born, if only to suffer?" Well, I wasn't having any of that nonsen...
Day 13
Awakening?
The surgery seemed to go well and I left the turnip recovering overnight. This morning, the lid had been removed from a container of soup (...
Day 12
Brain surgery
Following my appeal for help (January 17th), Chichester District Council received over 250 calls offering advice, many from qualified ne...
Day 11
Xmas lunch
An Xmas lunch that's rather late Does turnip fear he's on the plate? My photo-friends, the answer's plain He has no thoughts of future pain...
Day 10
Cry for help
I need help finding a suitable brain for the turnip, so I have put a notice in the window of my car. I think that using the King of Denma...
Day 9
Research 2
Now that the turnip has a face, I wondered if a brain could be added. According to Wikipedia, this is possible. It would be nice if the tur...
Day 8
Hand of the King
The hand in the picture belongs to my boss. He has long fingers because he is the King of Denmark, Hraflag XIV. That hand could comma...
Day 7
Turniptubbie
I thought that I might relate to the turnip more if it had a face and a leg. The face I have chosen is that of Tinky-Winky, a character f...
Day 6
Not very efficient
The response to yesterday's advert has been poor. In the meantime, I put the turnip to good use, stripping off old wallpaper in a h...
Day 5
For sale
I am selling the turnip. I have placed an ad on the popular selling site, 'Gumtree'. My asking price is £478. The description reads: "This tu...
Day 4
Destination: Turnip
Because I've been thinking all day about the turnip, I got confused when I was entering my journey into the satnav. The satnav sug...
Day 2
Disappointment
What I really wanted to buy yesterday was a baboon. My plan was to teach it to guard the shed from bad people. But then I thought a tur...
Day 1
Acquisition
Today, I bought a turnip. I had intended to buy it from Waitrose, but they had closed early due to a herring infestation. I went to Morris...
#313
Day 313
The complexity of life.
Living things are always complex structures. This is a slice through a Brassica tuber showing its complicated anatomy. Languag...